On Wednesday I hit a milestone birthday — I turned 50. The words feel strange in my mouth (and under my fingers), even though I haven’t hesitated to tell anyone who asks. In fact I almost respond as if I’m asking a question back.
Them: “Oh, is today your birthday? Which one is it?”
Thankfully, I’m not allergic to birthdays and I don’t go into bouts of depression over them either. It is a big one and I can feel its weight and yet at the same time I have to laugh at the absurdity of it all. I don’t feel older. I still don’t feel like an adult and I feel no different than when I was 25. Although, when I look back on those days I can now see just how big of an idiot I was and I’m thankful that at least some things have changed.
I’ve done a lot of “looking back” over the past few weeks. Grateful that I have few regrets. Thankful that I have many more years in front of me (hopefully) and blessed that the wheels haven’t fallen off the wagon just yet. I don’t have to take any medications, I still have some hair, I’m still married to my best friend and the most beautiful woman in the world. I’m also surrounded by friends and family — both near and far — that were gracious enough to let me know that they’re thinking about me this week.
Of course there could always be more money, more time, more travel, less work, less stress, and less strife but that’s what life is. Isn’t it? In my experience, you can’t have the good without the bad and as I take stock of my life I believe I’ve been dealt a winning hand.
Not much more to say, really. I’m still full of piss and vinegar and I have no plans to slow down anytime soon. There is still so much left to do! 🙂